DIVORCE

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DEFINITION:

Divorce, noun. :
            1
legal and formal
dissolution of a marriage  
            2
any complete separation or
disunion.

Dissolution ???... dissolution, noun.:
            1
a dissolving or being dissolved; specifically,
                    a)
a breaking up or into parts;
disintegration.  
              
     b)
the termination, as of a business, association, or union.
              
     c) death, the ending of life;
              
     d) the dismissal of an assembly or
adjournment of a meeting.

Disunion ??? ...disunion, noun.:
             1
the breaking up or ending of union;
             2
lack of unity;
discord.

Discord ???... discord, noun.:
              1
disagreement: dissension: conflict  
             
2
a harsh or confused noise, as the sound of battle; clash; din;
              3 a
lack of harmony, in tones sounded together; inharmonious
                 combination of tones; dissonance

Divorce is a difficult subject to discuss briefly. All divorces are different, just as all people are different. But, they are similar, just as all people are similar. Above, I have listed some definitions concerning divorce. The words used to define divorce are words of finality: disintegration, termination, death, adjournment, and separation..

But, what is divorce?

It is the legal end of a marriage. Two individual people legally joined by marriage, to be as one, divided into two individual people again. Simple, right? WRONG!

Marriages join families: mothers-in-law, fathers-in-law, sisters-in-law, brothers-in-law, children, nephews, nieces, and cousins. Marriages have children. Children have grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins. When a marriage is divorced, it divides whole families. Children no longer have the security of a family that is together, as a whole They now have separation of parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Now they have father's family and mother's family. Then, if, and when a parent remarries, it gets more confusing ---- different last names, more grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins and maybe half-brothers and half-sisters and step-parents. It can and does get complicated.

What about emotions? Are divorces devoid of emotion. NO!! Divorce can stress emotions to the maximum. All emotions: feelings of guilt, anger, sadness, remorse, despair, emptiness, and physical pain. Yes, physical pain. It can feel as if your heart has been literally torn out by the roots. And it is a pain that cannot be stopped with a pill from the drug store.

I believe God did not intend to have divorce as a common method of settling marriage problems. He intended for man and woman to be responsible and work out their problems of marriage, within the marriage ---- not to dissolve the marriage and move to another marriage to have similar problems. No, settle the problems where you are. Don't move on and involve more people in your problems. Work them out with the one that you love and understand.

Divorce needs to be the very last option considered, not the first. Sometimes divorce is the only way and the best way; but this is rare,-- if we are responsible and honest.

Be responsible, maintain your convictions. Let your family be one that remains whole.

It warms my heart to see marriages that have withstood. Mine did not.

I speak from experience and remain , - - Anonymous.